Emotional Frostbite: A Veteran’s Unfiltered Story of Survival, Strength, and Mental Health
Honoring Veterans This Month: A Veterans Day Feature
November is Veterans and Military Families Month, a time to recognize the strength, sacrifice, and ongoing battles our servicemembers face long after the uniform comes off. My academic background includes research on veterans’ mental health from my doctoral program days, and I’ve also known many veterans personally. I’ve seen firsthand how the weight of invisible wounds follows them home.
This month, I’m honored to feature their voices on my blog. Today’s story comes from Damien Celaya, an Army veteran whose honesty about survival, numbness, and recovery cuts through the stereotypes and speaks directly to the heart of what healing really means.
Interview with Damien Celaya
Q: Can you share how your military experience shaped your understanding of mental health?
"I was already familiar with mental health before I ever wore a uniform. Growing up with a mom who fought her own demons taught me early how deep those battles can go. So when I joined the military, it wasn’t my first exposure to struggle; it was just a new version of it. Funny thing is, the big problems I had before the military started to feel smaller by comparison. You see things downrange that rewire your scale of what “bad” really is. You start to develop this emotional numbness, a kind of cold efficiency that helps you push through chaos. At first, it feels like strength. Later, you realize it’s just emotional frostbite. That numbness becomes your favorite weapon, and the problem is… it works, until it doesn’t. It’s a terrible tool for healing, but it’s a hell of a survival skill."
Emotional Truth
“At first, numbness feels like strength. Later, you realize it’s just emotional frostbite.”
Q: What has been the most important lesson you’ve learned about resilience and recovery?
"Resilience isn’t about being unbreakable; it’s about being too damn stubborn to stay broken. Everyone thinks it’s about “bouncing back,” but sometimes it’s just dragging yourself forward through the mud, fueled by caffeine, sarcasm, and spite. I learned early that struggle doesn’t go away; you just get better at fighting dirty. Recovery’s not clean or inspirational. It’s messy, unpredictable, and usually shows up wearing sweatpants and apathy. But it’s real."
Resilience Redefined
“Resilience isn’t about being unbreakable, it’s about being too damn stubborn to stay broken.”
Q: How has your journey with mental health influenced your life after service?
"It made me allergic to fake positivity and performative healing. I’ve lived around mental struggle my whole life, my mom’s, mine, my brothers and sisters in arms, so I know the difference between surviving and pretending. I learned to stop dressing pain up and just talk about it, even if it makes people uncomfortable. That’s where the real connection happens. And now, through what I do, whether it’s coffee, humor, or community, I try to make space for that kind of honesty. Healing doesn’t always look peaceful. Sometimes it looks like a dark joke and a strong cup of coffee."
Q: What advice would you give other veterans or individuals struggling with mental health challenges?
"You can’t out-tough your brain. You can’t suppress, ignore, or joke it into submission, though we’ll damn sure try. The real strength is in recognizing when you’re tapped out and reaching for help instead of a bottle. Find your tribe, the ones who can handle your dark humor, your silence, and your bad days. You don’t need a perfect recovery plan; you just need a reason not to quit. Even if that reason is just to prove the universe wrong one more day."
Q: What do you wish more people understood about mental health in the veteran community?
"That it’s not new to us, it’s just magnified. The military doesn’t invent trauma; it just turns the volume all the way up. We don’t want pity, awareness ribbons, or lectures about mindfulness. We want honesty, brotherhood, and the freedom to not be okay without being treated like a grenade with the pin half-pulled. The dark humor, the sarcasm, the silence, it’s not dysfunction, it’s how we bleed without making a mess."
Why This Story Matters
Damien’s story strips away the polished narratives we often hear about resilience and recovery. It highlights that healing is rarely linear or neat; it is raw, imperfect, and deeply human. Veterans navigate challenges like emotional numbness, isolation, and trauma that can be difficult for outsiders to understand. By sharing unfiltered accounts, we move beyond pity and stereotype, creating awareness that fosters empathy and encourages more honest conversations about mental health.
Closing Reflection
Featuring stories like Damien’s is not only about recognition, it’s about inspiration and actionable insight. Veterans’ mental health struggles are real and multifaceted, yet they do not define their full experience. By listening actively, validating their journeys, and providing spaces for open dialogue, we help build resilience, strengthen community, and reduce stigma. Let this story serve as a reminder that recovery is complex, survival is courageous, and showing up, even when it’s hard, is itself an act of strength.
The Voice Behind the Words
Damien Celaya is a U.S. Army veteran with three deployments, two to Afghanistan and one to Kuwait that extended into Iraq, Dubai, Bahrain, and Qatar. He served in both Infantry and Communications/IT, later becoming an MOSQ Instructor, training incoming soldiers before they were thrown into real chaos.
He also supported a joint mission in Australia. After service, he became a strong advocate for veterans, first responders, and mental health, while openly working on his own stability right alongside the people he supports. He founded Freedom Bear Coffee to keep serving, just now, with caffeine, dark humor, and community impact instead of weapons systems.
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